My Cure III – Yet again another personal choice of songs by The Cure
I know what a lot of you are now thinking. “Oh dear god, Jack, another list?” And then I’d say “Yes, another list.” It’s been over half a year since I wrote the second part. A lot has changed since then and I feel like it’s time for more whining and bitching over my part. I already have part IV planned, but I won’t write it until I have every regular album by The Cure (I’m still missing “The Top” and “The Head On The Door”). Part V is also planned, which will be some kind of Best Of, I suppose. Since the last part I got hold of “Faith”, “Wild Mood Swing” and some other B-Sides (e.g. from “The Cure” and “4:13 Dream”) and rarer stuff. You know the routine, there’s no ranking, because I love each song equally.
So, let’s get this started.
1. Plainsong (first appeared on “Disintegration”, 1989)
One of the most beautiful and simultaneously saddest songs I know of, which is a perfect example why I love The Cure so much. I’m not much of a fan of “Disintegration” (and I know a lot of people who’ll hate me for that), but this one song gives me chills. It tells about how the world is going to end, yet in the same second sounds promising that everything will turn out fine. Sometimes, just one smile makes me feel like it’s the end of the world.
Favourite part: Sometimes you make me feel // Like I’m living at the edge of the world // “It’s just the way I smile” // You said
2. Trap (first appeared on “Wild Mood Swing”, 1996)
As much as I love their love songs, I can’t deny that I also love the songs filled with pure hatred. I’m really sick of those endless rants from various people of how this world is absolutely unfair and that they have done nothing wrong why they deserved eternal torment and pain. This partially reminds me of me and how adolescence was for me, though, but I’ve grown out of that ever since. Whenever I listen to this song, I can’t help but think of this little quote I found somewhere: “I was once what you are and what I am you will become.” Guess that’s true.
Favourite part: Drowning like a fly in my drink // You whine about being out of synch // But I really don’t care what you think // I’m sick of it all
3. Never Enough (first appeared on “Mixed Up”, 1990)
I’m ashamed they released this terrible piece of shit of an album they call “Mixed Up” in there year I was born. Damn you, Robert. Seriously. However, this little song makes that up to some degree, although I’m sure it could have been done better. I prefer the live version that can be found on the “Show” CD, with some altered lyrics, which shows how ironic their songs can be. It’s not really a song about hate, but more about the inability to satisfy the people, no matter how much effort you put into something. However much I fuck around, it’s never enough, isn’t it?
Favourite part: However I smile // I smile the most
4. Play (first appeared on the B-Side of “High”, 1992)
It’s a little bit weird that “Play” is a B-Side featured on “High”, the single that contains another B-Side called “This Twilight Garden” which I’ve previously written about (Damn, I still consider it one of their best songs ever, period). Completely different songs with different topics, yet I feel like they have so much in common. Whereas “This Twilight Garden” is more about being together with the love of your life, “Play” is about being in love and the affection is not returned. All the waiting, longing and hoping for things to change or, more precisely, for someone to change is always followed up by great despair and grief. So much time has passed, yet nothing has changed at all. But I guess things aren’t meant to be if you have to wait for better conditions. It either works perfectly fine or … it doesn’t. End of story.
Favourite part: You give me everything you have // Knowing it can never be enough // My heart’s too old // Too hard // Too cold // For your love
5. Bare (first appeared on “Wild Mood Swing”, 1996)
“Bare” is the second song from “Wild Mood Swing”. Some people will probably wonder what the fuck is wrong with me. I know all those worn out phrases of how awkwardly bad this album is. Well, guess what, I think it’s amazing. There are a few songs which indeed sound terrible, but apart from them, this album has to offer one of the most personal songs written by Robert. “Bare” is no exception. When everything slips away, the time where all it ends, there’s always this neat little sentence which I’ve heard far too often. “We can still be friends.” Heh. Ladies of the world, I now present you the shocking truth you’ll obviously don’t want to hear (or read, whatever): Stick this phrase up your ass. It’s not funny. It sucks. Badly. Nothing hurts more than pretending to stay in touch with the former beloved one. Men are just playing it cool. And I’ll never forget t those moments, no matter how hard I try, much to my regret.
Favourite part: So if you’ve got nothing left to say // Just say goodbye // Turn your face away // And say goodbye // You know we’ve reached the end // You just don’t know why // And you know we can’t pretend // After all this time
6. 39 (first appeared on “Bloodflowers”, 2000)
As much as I hate to use the word, but this song is one of the two epic songs featured on this list. “Bloodflowers” is probably my favourite album, because there is actually no song I consider to be bad. Give it a go, you won’t be disappointed. Nevertheless, “39” obtains its beautifulness out of its ugliness. It’s loud, noisy, with all the instruments playing disarranged, added with Robert almost screaming his lyrics. I love how he has sung it, because it makes this already gloomy song even more intense. You know that feeling when you, figuratively, try to keep the fire ablaze, the fire that symbolizes the dying relationship. It’s staggering when you realize everything you did was effortless and not even worth it. At one point, you come to think about it and stop caring at all, because it’ll be just useless eventually and you see no reason to live in hell.
Favourite part: So the fire is almost out and there’s nothing left to burn // I’ve run right out of thoughts and I’ve run right out of words // As I used them up …
7. Bloodflowers (first appeared “Bloodflowers”, 2000)
The second song I consider to be epic. I rarely use the word “epic”, but I can’t think of a word that describes those two songs better. Additionally, it’s also a song from “Bloodflowers”. It starts relative calm and slowly, but ends up so heavy, dark and depressive. Again, the way Robert sings here makes it more intense. I always listen to “Bloodflowers” after “39”, because they basically sound almost the same with related lyrics. This time, though, it’s not the narrator who ends up thinking that keeping this relationship alive is useless, but merely the former lover. In “39”, I felt like the lyrics were written by me, since I realized that feeding the fire is no-good. This time I’m more likely the person who tries to keep things going (which has happened in one or two relationships) who gets told that going on is meaningless … How ironic. It always ends, I guess.
Favourite part: Never fade // Never die // You give me flowers of love // Always fade // Always die // I let fall flowers of blood
8. Primary (first appeared on “Faith”, 1981)
The earliest song I listed here. I don’t know why there are few of the older songs and I really can’t think of a rational reason. However, this song is stuck in my head. One reason being there are two bass guitars, which results in a nice upbeat tune. TWO. Playing simultaneously. How awesome is that? I fucking love a good bass. The other reason is that Robert composed this song in memorial of the suicide of Ian Curtis the year before, who was the vocalist of the band “Joy Division” (which is probably my second most favourite band ever). “Primary” is about growing up and, to tell the truth, I don’t want to grow up. Sometimes, I wish I was still ten, back when the world wasn’t so confusing. But then again, that would also mean I’d have to go through puberty again and I can pass on that. After almost twenty years, I realized that ignorance can be bliss.
Favourite part: The air no longer in my throat // Another perfect lie is choked // But it always feels the same
9. Us Or Them (first appeared on “The Cure”, 2004)
Possibly their loudest song ever, so filled with hate, full of allegations and swearing, I can’t help but absolutely loving this song. There is sort of a connection with “Trap” I can’t deny, because they share a certain similarity regarding the lyrics, but “Us Or Them” is nevertheless a very nice and original hate song. Unfortunately, you can’t just turn off feelings with a snap of your fingers. As long as this is impossible, I guess I have to live with the pictures of certain people in my head I’d rather not think of. I usually summarize this song like this: “You don’t want me. I don’t want you. Are we even now?” Thankfully, I don’t have to answer a question like this …
Favourite part: “I live in knowledge of real truth // And all my gods are great!” // The doleful cant of a bigot // Blinded by fear and hate // You live in knowledge of real truth? // Oh the biggest lie I heard // How sick in your mind and soul // To be scared of my voice and my words
10. Going Nowhere (first appeared on “The Cure”, 2004)
How I wish I would’ve considered just leaving it. Leaving everything behind, everything I built, everything I established. But I didn’t. I’m a coward when it’s about making decisions. I feel like there is no place to go. Sometimes, I’m too fucking blind to see what’s killing me. So I stay in place, wishing for dreams to come true, but, eventually, they don’t. In this song, Robert sings in about the most likely saddest way ever. So deeply, deeply sad, he even shivers in the end, which in return makes me shiver, too. That barely happens because of one single song. Amazing piece of music …
Favourite part: I’m going nowhere // Don’t look so scared // I’m going nowhere // So tell me that you love me again // Tell me that you care
11. It Used To Be Me (first appeared on the B-Side of “The 13th”, 1996)
Ever had this feeling when you think insanity cripples your mind? When you’re standing beside yourself? Sometimes, it feels like I’m going slightly mad. That usually happens when something tragically occurred or too many people demand too many tasks to be done by me. The time where I wish I was someone else or somewhere else, where no one bothers me. Every now and then, my own thoughts are driving me crazy. Not that I’m schizophrenic or anything like that, but they darken my mood so badly I have to force myself to stop doing any harm on anybody who gets in my way. Well, I guess everybody has this sort of evil alter ego inside them … To me, the only way to calm down is listening to some good music, like this song here. Interestingly, “It Used To Be Me” is also a song from the “Wild Mood Swing” era, but apparently a B-Side. Why didn’t they put it on the album? God, that would have made it even better than it already is.
Favourite part: Until my whole head screams with grinding my teeth // Desperate to find a single word I can keep // Any kind of faith // Any kind of fix // Oh just any kind of word that doesn’t make me sick
12. There Is No If … (first appeared on “Bloodflowers”, 2000)
This is, sort of, the only real love song in my list. Yes, sort of. If it weren’t for the second half of this song, this would be considered a really nice, bittersweet love song. At least, on one hand. On the other hand, it just ends rather sad. The first half is more of declaring your love to that special someone, but you know how it is. Sometime soon, things just won’t work anymore and the partner breaks up the relationship. I’m not sure if I like this twist or hate it … But anyway. You may not see the end coming, but when it comes, it hits you really hard. In the end, there will always be tears. At least, here she didn’t suggest staying in touch and being friends. Ahem. I would have loved to hear something like “Remember when I did? I meant it.” Oh well …
Favourite part: “If you die” you said “so do I” you said… // And it starts the day you make the sign // “Tell me I’m forever yours and you’re forever mine // Forever mine… “
13. Truth Goodness And Beauty (first appeared on the B-Side of “The End Of The World”, 2004)
I can’t say I’m the happiest person on this planet and a lot of … well, bad things happened in the last years, but this didn’t stop me from dreaming for a better world. Maybe I’m just on the road to my ruin, who knows? I don’t give a damn, because I love daydreaming. Dreamers are there to dream of the impossible. When everything else failed horribly, my imagination always helped me out to survive certain situations. I know that you can’t think your way into good living, but you can live your way into good thinking. Always keep that in mind, folks. If you don’t decide to be happy, you probably will never be.
Favourite part: All I say is a lie she sighs // Nothing I say is true // And all I do is bad she cries // Nothing I do is good // And yeah, all I am is ugly // Nothing I am is beautiful at all
14. Treasure (first appeared on “Wild Mood Swing”, 1996)
That’s right, another song from “Wild Mood Swing”. It really does have some of the most personal songs ever made and “Treasure” is another perfect example. This song is, literally, a treasure to me, because it’s possibly the most beautiful song on this album. I’ve always spent more time with a smile on my face than not, but the thing is, I don’t write about it, but I still haven’t forgotten how to smile. For me, just a simple smile is worth far more than money or presents, you can’t just compensate such a beautiful act in life with worldly possessions. I love to think about past things, how dumb, irrational or maybe even beautiful they are, just to make myself smile, no matter how long it’s been or with whom I had those special moments.
Favourite part: “Remember me and smile… // For it’s better to forget // Than to remember me // And cry… “
15. End (first appeared on “Wish”, 1992)
Finally, we’ve reached the last song called “End”. I figured the eponymous name fits very well, although it might be just another stupid pun. Well, anyway. Sometimes, I think the end is just the beginning of the same old game. When everything just starts to repeat itself, when things from the past knock on your door and everything happens all over again. That’s the point where giving up or going on is both the same dead end to me, because I can’t just let it … end. Clinging to your hopes does suck every now and then, especially when they’re just fading away eventually. There is this sort of connection with “Trap” about other people lamenting how awfully horrible their life tends to be, although I don’t consider “End” to be a hate song, but more likely a song about desperation about letting go and the inability to do so.
Favourite part: I think I’ve reached that point // Where every word that you write // Of every blood dark sea // And every soul black night // And every dream you dream me in // And every perfect free from sin // And burning eyes // And hearts on fire // Are just the same old song
Well, that’s it. I hope you enjoyed reading the third part of My Cure. Maybe now you’re going to listen to a song you previously hated at all costs! If so, then I have fulfilled my deed when writing this. Nothing I said here is meant personally. But in case you do understand it personally … you probably should. If there’s anything left you like to know, feel free to write me a message or leave a comment. I’d appreciate it! And by the way, I didn’t drink any alcohol while writing this. Don’t be surprised if it’s not as emotional written as you’re used to. Well, I suck at writing while being sober. Have a good day and don’t forget to smile every now and then!
One thing left to say:
“They may not like us, but they can’t get away from knowing who we are.”
- R. Smith
